#( . anon )

[frownyalfred]

I literally never considered the whole Batman being called 'B' and then reporting back to 'A' but now that you've mentioned it, I'm obsessed with the idea. I mean, imagine meeting Batman, seeing him in the field, how hard he fights, only for him to report back to 'A'. Especially if you hear how people who've met A talk about him, like:

Batman: I'll give you each 10k if you don't tell A that I busted my shoulder

Nightwing: Sorry B, you're on your own

Red Hood: Hell no cheapskate, I wouldn't do it for 100k

Superman: I don't want to get on A's bad side :(

there's things that the JL have "heard" about A that only make him even scarier (some of these I compiled from the other post):

uses lethal force even when B won't

never leaves Gotham, like some kind of mafia don

has the ability to punish B and/or remove him from active field service

A's urgent requests take priority, even above the JL. B zetas down to Gotham without asking a single follow up question, he just goes

"You think B is bad about [thing], A is even worse." -- a sentence said jokingly by many a Batkid, over the years

[markscherz]

You know how tumblr will recommend random communities on ppl's dash? I just got recommended the Frogblr community and my immediate first thought was "Mark Scherz better know about this and if he doesn't I'll tell him because he deserves to be in it more than anyone" and clicked it to check if you're active there and found out you run the place lmao. I've underestimated your power 🫡

[barrenclan]

what is wrong with bluebell's eyes?

I would maybe not phrase the question like that, but Bluebell has a lazy eye condition called exotropia where one of her pupils (specifically, the left) permanently faces outwards. It's possible for lazy eyes to cause some visual impairment (and I imagine Bluebell does have some visual difficulties from it) but there's nothing wrong with it, it's just a feature she was born with.

[cute-girls-from-vns-anime-manga]

Spyfamily would have been better if it wasn't a gag manga.

WRONG SO WRONG, THE LIGHT HEARTED COMEDY IS WHAT KEEPS THE MANGA FROM GETTING OVERLY DARK

[paper-mario-wiki]

your post about freakTV bumpers was going around again a few weeks ago and one of them has doug walker in it and ive been trying to find that specific clip for AGES since i saw it on here a few years ago. do you have it?

here you go, dream warrior

original song by Jerryterry here

[yelenasdiary]

Hi 👋🏾 I just sent a request in not too long ago but I forgot to specify that it's a Fem!Reader it was this one :

something where everyone thinks R is treating wanda poorly bc they're polar opposites (R is kinda a brick wall + wanda isn't all perky but she's just nice and more open) and wanda hasn't come around since they've been together but in reality wanda is just so happy that she's forgotten about everyone ?

Consumed By You

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem! Reader, Avengers x Fem! Reader

Summary: Wanda’s family think you don’t treat Wanda right…

Angst with Happy ending. 

Warnings: Hints of an abusive relationship? | 1.1K

AC: Thank you for sending this. I personally don’t like how somebody can just drop or ‘forget’ about their friends/family just because they’re dating somebody so this is a little angst and Wanda kinda gets a reality check. I hope you enjoy! 

It had been months since the compound was filled with the warm smell of freshly baked muffins that Wanda would often bake for the team. At first, it was understandable. She found somebody she really liked and wanted to spend more time with them. But as days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months, Wanda’s family couldn’t let the thought that her absence was against her will. 

Natasha was the one to bring the issue to Wanda’s attention, sending her a flurry of frantic texts, trying not to scare the woman away. 

“They miss me” Wanda said, her voice soft as she looked up at her phone. Sitting on the sofa beside you, her head resting against your shoulder as you were reading a new book you had recently picked up. 

“You should go see them” you replied. Wanda sighed, remembering the last time she saw them. “I don’t know, I don’t think I want to hear about how the world is in danger yet again”

You finished reading the paragraph you were on before closing your book and gently placing a hand on her knee, “I think you should see them, baby” you said softly.

“I guess I could pop in for an hour tomorrow” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. 

You could hear the doubt in her voice, “how about I come with you” you suggested, “I mean, if you want” you added.

Wanda’s face lit up as she lifted her head to look at you, “Really? You want to come?”

“Yeah” you smiled softly, meeting her gaze, “this if your family” 

Wanda smiled before placing a soft kiss on your lips and texting Nat the news. 

The next day, you and Wanda arrived at the compound around midday. Her family greeted her with smiles and hugs, happy to finally see her after so long. You greeted the Avengers politely, even though you noticed the surprised looks from Steve and the deep glaring gaze from Natasha, you tried to ignore it for Wanda’s sake but deep down, you didn’t feel very welcomed. 

Later, after conversations of catching up over pizza and Tony’s questionable cocktails, you watched Wanda from afar as she reconnected with those she called family. “So, Wanda tells me you’re quite the artist” Pepper smiled, taking a seat beside you, taking your attention away from Wanda. 

You chuckled lightly, “well, I wouldn’t say that. I like to make things sometimes” you turned to her. 

What you didn’t see was Wanda being whisked away by Nat, Clint and Steve. While you and Pepper spoke about your crafts and love for art, Wanda was confused by the three’s confusing words.

“Are you okay?” Natasha asked sternly with a hint of worry in her voice. Wanda frowned with confusion, “yes, I’m fine” 

“Are you sure? Because you don’t have to leave with her today. We’ll keep you safe” Steve inserted, making Wanda even more confused as her eyes shifted to him. “What are you guys talking about? I’m fine?” She replied. 

“Wands, this is the first time in months we’ve seen you. You don’t come around anymore….we barely hear from you and when we do, its short and sweet” Natasha explained. 

“We’re just worried that Y/n is…well, keeping you from seeing others” Clint added. 

Wanda couldn’t help but chuckle at the ridiculous assumptions. “Y/n isn’t keeping me from seeing anybody, you can’t be serious right now” 

“We’re serious Wanda” Natasha replied, again in a stern tone. Her tone making Wanda look between the three Avengers, seeing they weren’t in the slightest joking. “Guys” she started, “Y/n is nothing but loving and supportive of me” she continues. 

“We see how she treats you and little she seems to engage. It feels a little…dismissive” Steve confessed.

Wanda’s heart clenched. “She isn’t dismissive” she defended, “it’s just she’s a little quieter than others. She’s not expressive like everybody else, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care”

“Maybe not to you…but from the outside” Clint trailed off. 

“You’ve barely seen her! You don’t know her” Wanda argued. 

Natasha stepped forward, not wanting the argument to get too heated. “We’re just worried. You seem distant and like you’ve completely forgotten about us. You met her and suddenly you were gone. I think you can see where we are coming from” 

Wanda sighed heavily, seeing how her relationship looked to her family. “I promise you, it’s not like what you’re thinking. I just, I’ve just been so happy that I didn’t want to come here and have that dawning feeling that it could be taken away from me” she started. “I didn’t mean for this to hurt you all” she added. 

“You deserve to be happy, Wanda. You deserve the world” Steve said, placing a hand on her shoulder, “but the world isn’t Y/n” he added. 

“You can’t just cut everybody out, even if you are happy” Clint said, “we’re your family. We’re here for you, always. Even if you’re in a relationship. We want to know her, we want to be a part of your life too” he went on.

A wave of guilt washed over Wanda, she’d been so consumed in you and her feelings for you that she didn’t realize that her excuses for neglecting to enjoy life outside of her relationship was turning those closest to her. “I understand” she said, her voice sincere. “I’m sorry, I haven’t been fair, and I don’t want you all to keep this image that Y/n is a bad partner because she is so far from that. I want you guy to see how wonderful she is” 

Nat smiled softly at her friend, “then allow us that. We want to know how great she is but she can’t do that if you close us out” 

Wanda nodded softly, “I know….how about we start with a weekly dinner?” She offered. The three standing before her smiled, “sounds like a great start” Steve said. 

The talk wasn’t easy, and it left Wanda feeling a bit exposed, but she knew deep down they were right. She had a life beyond you, but she was so scared that life would take you from her. As she walked out with Nat, Clint & Steve behind her, she saw you laughing with Pepper. The image in front of her made her smile as she wandered over to you. 

“What did I miss?” Wanda asked softly, taking a seat beside you. 

“Y/n was just telling me a story about the two you” Pepper smiled softly, 

“Yeah, remember that time you made me try some of those ridiculous TikTok filters?” You looked to your partner, giving her a soft smile. Wanda nodded, the memory flashing through her mind, “wait until I show the others the screenshots” she chuckles. 

“Don’t you dare!” Your eyes widen. Something about her presence felt different but you didn’t want to question it. Wanda teased, pulling out her phone as she broke into a laughter you haven’t heard in a very long time. 

“Oh, come on baby, the world show see these!” She laughed. “Please, it’s the last thing the world needs!” You laughed along with her.

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[0wldn0]

Aww I love the bumblebee/Optimus father-son duo! It’d be really funny if like if the autobots and the suctions had a family dinner, considering your last Breakbee post was breakdown trying to convince bumblebee to meet his family ! Just a thought! Love the art 💕✨✨

BAHAHA OMGG I love the idea of the Earth team all having a family dinner together!! Maltos, Autobots and the Stunticons 😭💕💖Imagine Breakdown convinces his side of the family and Bee convinces his side to make it happen...

I can totally see OP giving Breakdown nasty looks the whole time though 😶 He always supports Bee's choices, but this time, he does NOT approve FDHDFH

It's okay, Motormaster will talk some sense into him. "I understand the yellow one is like your child but those are two whole adults leave them alone thank you."

[anamericangirl]

OKAY WAIT.

AS a Coloradan I think i have to say, COLORADO WAS RED. It was; when we (my family and i) were looking at the stats and scrolled in on Colorado, only Denver and Boulder were blue, okay? I just want that to be said, because people act like Colorado is a blue state when that is just. not the case

And that’s really how most blue states happen. They’re not blue because all areas of the state are majority democrat, they’re blue because they have 2 or 3 major metropolitan areas that vote blue and basically cancel out the rest of the state.

[dykefoolish]

Tommy made quackity too woke and the wokeness made dream upset

republican dream strikes again

[simpjaes]

No but IMAGINE stripper Jake— this tweet had me THINKING he’d definitely bend the rules a little bit if someone paid him enough https://x.com/every25th/status/1876759533051425126?s=46

not to steal my own plot from a fic i wrote years ago but....imagine being a lonely rich woman who doesn't need a man and your friend hires a stripper to come to ur house as a surprise, and jake shows up. he's not shocked or anything bc ur friend warned him that it's a surprise bur you're like "who the actual fuck are you?!" and he explains blah blah blah, you don't realize that he's not just a stripper, but sometimes, if he likes them enough, he also fucks his clients, all of which are usually very high end women with important jobs or families etc. he fr loves being a boy toy.....[also a total sugar baby] ...............so....listen.........what if i revamp.

[frownyalfred]

how long do you reckon baby bruce kneeled in his parents' blood before the police arrived?

That’s an interesting question. I’ve tried to parse it in my head a few times. There’s a lot of factors at play here, but I think it hinges on two major ones: how the crime is called in, and the responsiveness of GCPD in the area of town, at that time of night.

If someone heard the gunshots and called it in, it might take a while for the cops to show up. If someone saw the bodies in the alley, they’d come much faster. How isolated was the scene? How quickly could someone have found them? A shots fired call might take hours to respond to, and it’s likely someone would have stumbled across the scene before then. But it’s also Gotham — even if the alley was in a nice(r) part of town, gunshots don’t usually prompt people to run toward a crime scene.

Was this area on the decline for GCPD? Was it a priority area (aka near fancy establishments etc) to keep happy for the mayor etc? Maybe a shots fired call in the Narrows won’t ever get a response, but dozens of feet from a theater or fancy restaurant? That changes things. Gotham is corrupt enough that GCPD would absolutely prioritize certain calls for service sooner.

Then the logistical aspect — who arrives first? Depends on the call, GCPD would dispatch cruisers for a shots fired call. But an ambulance or fire truck would show up first if someone actually called in the bodies/crime scene itself. Likely very quickly, like 5-10 minutes after the call was made. GCPD might be a little behind that, maybe 10-15 minutes.

All in all — hard to say exactly, but at least 10 minutes from when the bodies themselves are discovered. Longer if it’s just a shots fired call. Probably, by my estimates, 15-30 minutes for how long he was there kneeling in the blood all alone.

(And if you’ve read my pack fic with Alfred, it would be even longer after that to convince him to leave their bodies)

[oppysbabydoll]

ok, follow me. In Animated Optimus asks how babies are made and looks HELLA shocked after getting an answer. But what if, and hear me out, he's so mystified by how humans can just CREATE NEW LIFE, that he accidentally develops a breeding kink. When he lands an afab partner, even if he's pretty sure they can't make a sparkling together, he's so enamored by the idea that it just comes out one time in the middle of bedroom activities. >3>

anon… ily <3 while i don’t personally have a breeding kink, this is such a fun idea! honestly from a scientific standpoint, pregnancy is such a fascinating subject & i love learning about it <3 to have it be a kink is funny to me but sweet in a way. especially since pregnancy is far from easy. here’s what i have. i sincerely hope you enjoy :) i put a lot of effort into it

optimus prime (tfa) x reader: breeding kink (nsfw)

before we begin: as afab is a term reserved for intersex, i won’t be using it. plus, not everyone that has a vagina is necessarily going to be able to give birth either. infertility and other medical conditions are very much a thing. so for this ask, i’ll be avoiding referring to the reader’s gender. hope that’s okay!

since learning about HOW humans are born from sari, optimus is… fascinated. cybertronians rarely have sparklings—or kids, as humans call it. how transformers are born changes from iteration from iteration, but based on optimus’ question, we can assume fragging does NOT lead to kids

yet despite this, whenever he’s doing you or vise versa, his mind tends to wander. thinking, yearning, hoping. and he gets so so excited at the prospect, of giving birth, that his horns honk. typically, you write it off as him being aroused during sex but when optimus lets the phrase, “impregnate me,” that gave you pause, stopping your thrusts, he lets out a whine, needy. you don’t continue

“w—why did you stop?” optimus’ engines let out a groan. ‘i want more’ is left unsaid. and normally, you’d indulge him. but your mind is too wrapped up in what he said that you have to ask—

“did you just say you want to be pregnant?”

he stops, engines spluttering off. despite all the fluids surrounding his spike, his modesty panels closes shut. he gapes at you, clearly caught off guard. “i—well—er,”he starts. he keeps on making noises, his engine starting but failing to fully be on. “uhm,” he continues. you touch his dorsal amour for a moment. it’s ridiculously warm; you had to pull away before it burns. “uh…” he says intelligently. god.

“optimus,” you start. immediately, he looks at you, still gaping. you need to kiss his mouth shut. “are…” you bit your lips, unable to find a better way to phrase the next sentence out of our mouth, “are you aroused from wanting to be pregnant?”

if optimus was red before, he’s practically lava colored now. he doesn’t respond, too embarrassed to say a word. but his silence is an answer in it of itself. you resists the urge to smirk, instead inching closer. you give a smile, smoothing it to hide your amusement. “i don’t think i can actually impregnate you but…” you lean in. “i can do you till you feel you are.”

he sucks in his breath. shivers in anticipation. “okay,” he says breathlessly. he looks at you eagerly, desperately, for your touch. “okay. works with me.”

you fuck him senseless, filling him with false spikes so it feels like he’s carrying. he looks so aroused when pretending to be impregnated then you can’t help but moan at the display. the two of you are having the time of your lives. you don’t ever impregnate him that way but when you and him ask ratchet and other researchers for scientific procedures to create a baby… let’s just say optimus ends up carrying <3 either way, you’re glad that you discovered a fun kink between you two. optimus may want more though hehe

[barrenclan]

Jack and Jadestrike are so beautiful. Ain't gonna lie.

YES THEY ARE!!!!

[kishdoodles]

🧨🦐

I've seen what you've done for others. why did mine explode so badly

[devotion-disorder]

You know what, I don’t like Bailey, I *hate* Bailey, eugh no thanks, but your art…. Your art does soemyhing to me… maybe he’s not so eugh after all

yes......YES.........my bailey propaganda is working...